Poetry
Of
The
Pains,
Struggles,
Joys,
And
Lessons
Of
Life
the
poems
of
Joel
POETRY OF THE PAINS, STRUGGLES, JOYS, AND LES
Unpublished work © 2006 Joel Denver Harris
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. Printed in the
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
I wish to acknowledge the support of some of the people that encouraged me to complete this book of poems: First of all my wife Shawna and my three kids for sparing me all those nights and weekends when I got inspired to write my heart out on paper, and I am forever indebted to you all; my parents Ken and Marge Harris and my younger brother Timothy for all their kindness, love, support and feedback, I really needed and appreciated your input; Nancy Turner my co-worker on the front line in the medical office I work at who was very encouraging to me in my writing and gave me great and helpful feedback on the poems I let her read; Shel Silverstein for his inspiration which I got after reading one of his books of poetry; Joel Saltzman for his inspiration after reading one of his books on how to write and keep writing; and most of all I want thank God for a talent that I never knew I had until one day I tried. This journey of writing has been an enjoyable and quite therapeutic one.
è Foreword è
“ A writer is not so much someone who has something to say as he is someone who has found a process that will bring about new things he would not have thought of if he had not started to say them.”
-William Stafford
I came home with my wife one evening and told her I must write. There was something burning inside my gut that needed to be expressed for my health and my sanity. We were in the middle of going through a very tough time in our marriage and in our family life. I had not yet discovered a useful outlet for all the emotion and passion I was feeling both good and bad. I did painting and I was interested in creating music, but something inside me told me to write. Since then I have been writing what I call poetry and I have not looked back.
This poetry at first was not meant for anyone but me to work as a type of talk therapy I needed desperately. I later discovered that what I was expressing, when shared with friends and family, was beneficial to those other than myself. The thought of creating a book was something I was conscious of, but not entirely convinced of its benefits.
This book was created in hopes of connecting, even in a small way, with others out there in this world. We all go through tough times and good times in life. My question to you is, do we really experience all those emotions? I have let myself open that door that is both scary and liberating. Whether you are a man or a woman, we all need to learn to feel again. People in society nowadays have forgotten about the heart that was placed in all of us. We choose not to feel and instead spoil ourselves with comforts and cheap substitutes that keep us from caring about others. It is what makes us human and what this crazy world tries to steal from us daily.
You may only connect with one of my poems or possibly many of them. Regardless, enjoy the ride and start putting your own pen to paper and you’d be surprised what comes out. Sharing this with others is the best part, because this may convince you that you are not alone in your journey in life.
I am now convinced that all can write, but just like learning to ride a bike, the more you do it, the more it comes naturally. Enjoy this book of poems, share it with those you love, and start creating your own artistic expressions.
Joel D. Harris
Alive With Five
Back again
5 Years now we’ve been more than just friends
People have said in the past
That relationship of yours
It wouldn’t last
Think Again
My friend
Were more together now
Then when we began
Rough roads
We’ve seen so many
Tried to take away our smile
Felt like we’ve been deserted at times
From friends and family
Well this is a message to everyone
5 years under our belt
Never regretted any one
I see now that the fun has just begun
Lies of the past exposed
Free to live more in the future
Trusting completely in God
Empowered by the Holy Spirit
Studying God’s Word
Utilizing the power of the name of God’s Son
We both know now there is more to our life than 9 to 5
Broken our hearts for the youth around us
We’re ready to drive
Out the enemy
Telling others how he lies
Watching to see those needy kids
Weeping and hands lifted in the air on their knees
Father forgive them, heal them, and set them free
We may have lost our own kids for a while
Thousands I see coming to You now
Using us as your vessels
Eyes gleaming from seeing new smiles
New boldness and passion is in both of us
What has been taken
Will be repayed with much interest
7 times?
Lets ask for 100!
My God is Big!
Why not ask for it?
Our family of 5
All the times we spend together
Who cares if it is only sometimes
We both cherish every moment
Not listening to the enemy
Spouting out his lies
I am thankful for anything
My God gives bountifully
Never let me down and I trust him for eternity
Our love, my sweet and tender wife
You have taught me so much
I have a whole lot more to learn
I look forward to each day and each night
Truly a friend for all seasons
Our love goes on
To others that may see it
Without rhyme or reason
That’s OK because what we have
You wouldn’t understand unless you lived it with us
Standing the test of time
That’s how I see the both of us
Too stubborn to quit
Too smart to be tricked
Still in love and enjoying it
You have always been beautiful to me
Even when your favorite outfit wouldn’t fit
Look at me!
I’m not a perfect sight to see
If it was about how we looked
God knows Cosmo wrote the book
We both would have failed
But thank God you love me for me
And that kind of love won’t fail
We’ve moved to a new place
Had many different jobs
Didn’t know if we could last in this space
God has always come through
Gotten closer
Had to trust in Him
Began some good new things
I see the future as bright
For You and Me
Hooray for 5 years
We made it!
Now let’s look forward to 50!
I hope this day is as special as it should be
For 5 years ago
It was if the only ones in the world
Were you and me
Cheers to 5 years!
We have made a beautiful family
Looking forward to the new things ahead
In my eyes I will always see in you, beauty
I love you babe
Ever so dearly
Happy 5 year Anniversary!
By: Joel D. Harris on
-for our 5 year wedding anniversary
All my children
All my children
They're not with me
With you neither
Where is your Daddy?
Who is your Mommy?
I am so sorry
To try to help you will just hurt you more
I reach out just to reach back
I clasp my hands around my own bleeding heart
You cry, sometimes you can't even find the tears to
I choose not to feel
Feelings are a dangerous thing
I am frozen when they come on
So strong, another side of me appears
The side of me I hold dear
I enjoy happiness and dislike pain
The pain is so deep my stomach pangs with despair
Better days are coming, but right now life sucks
Everyone is here to help you along your journey
They can't walk it for you
You wish this bad dream would be over
Waking up to see all your hopes and dreams fulfilled
The way back home is painful but good
All you can do is look up
Looking around and down only takes your breath away
You try to smile
You try to eat
How can you try to enjoy something that you didn't order.
The looks you get don't comfort
They only point to the empty space
You love them, they love you
Everyone means well, they say
No one here can comfort the one you love
You sometimes have a hard time loving your partner in pain
We keep walking
Wondering when
Wondering how
People ask will you make it?
Can you handle it when it comes?
I ask myself, can I wait long enough to see it through?
My eyes grow faint straining to see the promises
All I can do is close my eyes
Lay back
Rest in a hope only God can give me
Does faith come by beating,
from blisters, from pain, or from heartache?
If it does, I have had my fill for today!
Such anger rages in me!
Thinking I could, in my feebleness
change what has already been done.
What has been set to be released
Why do we look as if no wrong should ever befall us?
If all the evidence was laid before You
I know my mouth would be parched with guilt.
All I can believe in is the grace
With which I take a breath every day
I am still here, not out for the count!
This is a daily fight, but one I can win!
All I ask for now is the strength and sanity
To take on the next day coming
With this I lay down in honor of Your way
By Joel D Harris
All the fuss with us
What is all this fuss with us?
Could drive a righteous man to cuss
Why do we fight?
So passionately!
Both of us
Wanting to feel loved, important,
& needed
How can we be content, satisfied, and
be able to receive even a compliment
Without the insecurities of our past
shouting out doubtful obsenities?
This predicament I'm in frustrates me
I love my beautiful wife
She is truly dear to me
Yet sometimes she says & does things
These small things somehow enrage me!
I feel out of control
Something writhing from within me
I seek peace & harmony
A peace that comes from inside of me
Pressing in deeper
I seek answers
Knowing they will come
Something whispering
The spiritual part of me
Forgiveness
A reoccurring theme
It's benefits being taught to me
Many times we both have found
Much misunderstandings
Much lack of food, sleep, and ME time
Other needs and feelings being the root
of our misery
Yet sometimes
These reasons mysteriously evade my thinking
Some nights I feel I can't go on
How could I live with her?
How can she stand me?
Yet after we've talked, cried, and said I'm sorry
We end up in each others arms
Happily in bed making up
With each of us grinning
Later questioning
What had gotten into me?
Having to fight to stay committed
Choosing to not be rude, sarcastic,
Insensitive and quick witted
Deciding to fight alongside
Battling the true enemies of selfishness & pride
Reminding each other
That two in agreement
Are much better than two divided
A casualty of another marital genocide
Remembering back to why you got together
Accepting each others shortcomings
Enjoying simply walking and talking together
Appreciating the differences & quirks
Wondering if someday
You would marry me
I guess all this fuss
Is worth all the mess that comes
From me and you being us
I’ve concluded that working all the kinks out
Proves without a doubt
The best part is making up!
By: Joel D. Harris
On
Birthdays
Birthdays are something special to me
Because, it’s celebrating the day of my birth
And for the most part the cost to me is free
I’m thankful for the beautiful cards that come from a tree
And I am thankful for my home here on planet earth
How nice it is to have a cake and blow out a candle
Inviting your friends over to talk about how were all getting older
I can’t believe how the time fly’s into the sky’s
My hair grows thinner and my mind gets weirder
What are you thankful for?
Did I tell you about the time I chased down a wild boar? Just kidding!
What a laugh! I’m thankful for God breathing life into me
We kept having kids and finally decided we’d stop at 3
I’m also grateful for my Mom carrying me all of them months
I thank God I’m a man because I wouldn’t have lasted 1 month!
Don’t You just love ripping open a perfectly wrapped present?
Similar to what Mom had to endure to unwrap you
Who knows what tomorrow holds, but I’m sure happy for today!
Already wondering what I’ll have for breakfast tomorrow,
Something tells me not much has changed
So now I can’t wait for another birthday
I’ll have to wait another 365 days!
Thank you everyone for making it special
I’m actually glad it’s over. Maybe that is a sign of my age
Happy Birthday!
By: Joel & Shawna Harris
Blind Man Sees
Do you ever feel like a blind man?
I do
Everything around you so much more than what you could see
Other senses of yours
Picking up on things
While everyone around you scurries about doing busy things
You shake your head
Some people just need to go back to bed
What is all this stressing for?
For once in your short life
Learn to close the door
Tossed like a rowboat on a choppy sea
You are driven around
Feeling you are helpless to do anything else
I may be blind, but I can see your puppet strings
Refusing to do what you should
To obey
Your fellow puppets line up every day
Ready to get their fill
At the pharmacy
Playing the victim to the ills of this society
Taking enough pills to count as one meal
Anyone going to stop this insanity?
Thinking that this dot of a life
Doesn't matter in relation to eternity
Better check what you’re thinking
Their may be lies inside
Wanting to bring you to insanity
Every day counts
Like deposits in your bank account
Laid up for you in eternity
Is your heart intact?
Seeing your brother and sister hurting
Or do you just live your life ready to react?
Are you on the attack?
Step back my friend
Wisdom is trying to get in
Live your life for others
Start today if you’re ready to begin
Having to trust
That there is dust
In front of me to step on
Willing to leap
Into the deep blue sea
Believing the God I love will carry me on
To a future only storytellers could speak on
I wish sometimes I couldn’t see
Everyone always talking about the all important
Me
I want to be able to do some crazy cool kind things
To others around me
Without thinking of stinking Me
Yet it is so hard to just open my door
Step out into this so called scary world
Look beyond me and see so much more
Will it take a tragedy?
Another cataclysmic terrorist hit on our humanity
Does life as you know it need to come to a halt?
Come down with a sickness
Now a 24/7 focus on you
More than you ought
Let's hope it doesn't come to this
Judgments cup poured out
So much worse
Than if we would have heeded to mercy's kiss
God
I'm tired of last minute believers
The thief on the cross
Should have been one of those last minute seekers
So wake up folks
If you have to walk around blind folded for a day
Don't be afraid
The God I know is the same tomorrow
As He is and was Yesterday
Let Him take you by the hand
Lead you like a blind man
He makes sure all those that follow Him are well fed
Rest assure there is more good times to come
Eternity is waiting for you
Even after you’re long gone and dead
Sometimes I think the blind man sees more
Than me and my foolish head
Written by: Joel D. Harris
on
But I'm just a kid
But I'm just a kid!
You say to yourself today
Who can use me anyway?
Looking at yourself
Seeing only deficiencies
Hoping you're dreams will come soon
Hoping it's before you turn forty
Nine times out of ten
That bump on your face
A painful reminder of pimples arising
Again and again
Who can use me?
I’m grateful I have even one friend!
Tip you're chin up!
God can use you now my friend
You have so much
Don’t look so closely at yourself
The young warrior that you are
Remember this, warriors never give up!
The energy you have
No fear!
Smack dab in the face of adversity
I have called these young of mine
End-Time Spiritual Kamikazes
You will drive out the enemy
With a smile!
Make them confused and angry
The remains of them
Scattered abroad for miles
Laughing, you can't believe your eyes
Kids are a part of great feats in history
Look at David, Joseph, Daniel, Samuel
That's just mentioning a couple of these
These obedient kids
Used by God mightily
Why wait for future events
Letting them determine your fate
Refuse to accept
The despising eyes of those
Who think they are the spiritually great
Look them in the eyes
Inform them of one historical truth
Great changes in history
Start with changes in the youth!
Jesus didn’t turn the kids away
Despite everyone with him
They tried to push them away
He said let them come to me
He laid his hands on them
They left from there happily free
Pursue a life of purity and peace
Study the Word and hunger for more of it
Don’t tolerate even a whiff of sin
Ask God to give you a sinful appetite suppressant
He told you to ask and you shall receive
He won’t leave you hanging
Don’t wait till you got a wife and family
Hoping then you’ll be ready
To take your thoughts into captivity
By then it may be late
All the sin you’re in
Pounding in the last nail to your fate
Choose now while you are young
Don’t regret what you could have begun
Know the truth now
Let it set you free
Don’t entertain that lying spirit of doubt
Take that narrow road to everlasting life
Don’t be content with mediocrity
Be that one kid
The one who listened
The one who did
Confess the great callings that you have
Don’t be a sell out
Whining like all the other kids
Giving this sorry excuse that’s getting old
But I’m just a kid!
By: Joel D. Harris ON
Coffee
To wake up in the morning
I need something to get me going
Long night before morning
Rough week, my body's groaning
What am I to do?
I think I'll start up some brew
Grind up some Mocha Java Beans
Yes, that's what I'll do
When it is done a brewing
I'll pour it in a great big mug I've been storing
Add some cream and some sugar
That's how I like my cup
My cup of keep me going
Cup of Joe some may call it
Well my name is Joe and I like it
With a scone or a muffin
Banana Bread & Cinnamon Rolls
Yes, I'll be stuffing
A simple, pleasing meal I enjoy often
Get your coffee
Get your pastry
Have a seat, take a rest
Then get going
We do it every day
I know someone is profiting
Coffee is a small drink
Some think nothing of it
In my books though
It's a cup of enjoyment
Coffee
I love it!
By: Joel D. Harris on
Driving in a Storm
Swish, Squeak
Swish, Squeak
My face nearly touching the windshield
I strain to see the dark foggy road ahead of me
The lights of occasional oncoming traffic nearly blinding me
A couple hours of this ahead of me
My family sleeps as if oblivious to this journey of misery
All this fun wrapped up into one
Driving in a storm
OH …
I wish I were home.
Daydreaming of sitting in my comfy Lazyboy chair
Warming myself beside the fire
Relaxed and enjoying some pleasant reading
I’d pay top dollar to be there now
Instead I’m here sweating profusely
Must keep the heater on high
Hoping it will clear up some of the haze
in front of me
Storming out there
In this car of mine I still feel vulnerable
Rain falling like bullets
A mighty attack going on in the air
Feel like giving up constantly
In this battle of life
Seems like too much for me to bear
My mind it plays tricks on me
As if it sees me in my weakness
Increasing wherever possible my misery
I have to get my grounding
I roll my window down
Stick my head out and look out in front of me
Then I look down
At the soaked blacktop below me
Soaking wet now
This crazy act helped me taste reality
I think I’m Ok
OK to drive again
Knowing this storm like many in life
They come on hard
And it seems like there’s no end
I will make it home like always
Just got to trust that there is God up above me
Caring so much and wanting to get to know me
“Drive on young man”, He says
In this storm you just got to trust Me
Stop looking at your circumstances
Find your peace in Me
If I had it my way
I’d never have to drive my family in a storm any day
Would hide in my house all secure
Thinking that danger would be far from me
But the battle is everywhere you are
Stop trying to run from it
Get in your car
Drive through that wicked storm
Practice that thing called Faith
Trust and step out of the norm
Not knowing if there is ground below you
Never stepping out of your comfort zone
Will God say he never knew you?
Like a fictional character
From The Twilight Zone!
We’ve got to deal with this fear we have
It is robbing us blind
Keeping us up at night
It’s driving us mad!
Making us run around
Like blind mice, all confused
Lies is all were being told
Trust God and walk on courageously
Start to live!
The rains will come and beat against us
The thunder will bang its clumsy symbols
Trying to scare us
The fog will roll on in
Making us feel like we can’t see anything
You may even think this is the end
But it’s not!
It’s just another storm like before
Take your best shot!
All soaking wet and cold
I’m choosing to drive on through
Can’t wait to get home
I may only be able to see 2 feet in front of me
But that’s OK
I look up and I look to my heart
Peace I have inside
No one can take away
All Hell could be burning around me
I’m dwelling instead in Your presence
Drinking from Your peaceful waters
Happy to go there any time I need to
I know I’m going to be OK
Thank You Lord
You take time to teach me things
Even when I’m driving in a storm
By: Joel D. Harris On
FASTING
Today is the day
No breakfast
No lunch
No dinner
Why? You say
Get on my knees
I pray
So many needs
People needing to be freed
Wanting to be
The Man
The Husband
The Father
I was called to be
Tired of being sick
Flat broke
Busted
My head on a great trip
Empty house
Makes me sick
Family fighting
Scared of failing
Or what somebody is thinking
GET OVER IT!
Gather up that nervous saliva
Spit!
Not going to swallow that pill
Society would feed me
Everyone is taking it
The T.V.
It advertises it
No food for me today!
Maybe tomorrow
Maybe Not!
I say
A lot stronger inside
Than I had ventured to believe
Its funny how food
I used to think
Would meet my needs
Fasting
For the chosen few
Deny yourself
Free your health
Examine the wealth
Laid up for those
Those who spend a day
Refusing to indulge
Those quiet desires
My appetite
It burns in my stomach
Like a thousand fires!
Food had a hold on me
Had is the word
Because it used to be
Appreciating whatever I have
A simple meal
Is now what I see
Enjoying it with the company of another
That is what breaking bread
Was meant to be
This world’s big on gluttony
Looking down at my waist
It sure had fooled me
Keeps me warm at night
Also makes me hot and sweaty
Fast
It is good
Do it for your body
There has got to be something
Worth all this sacrificing
Some things in life
Only answered
By withholding.
By Joel D. Harris
Free?
How does it feel to be free?
Thought I was free
Felt I could see
Never looked inside
To find I was occupied
Others making their home
In this earthen vessel
Unknown
Oh my!
Had so many struggles
This life I thought had dealt me
A couple bad shuffles
Had hints of truth
But been whispered to
Too many lies
Boy I gotta be careful
How I decide
Which thoughts are let to wander
Keeping the truth to ponder
A battle in my head
Many don’t realize the position I am in
Called to direct others
Tired of seeing others around me
Confused and needing to be freed
Time to take back what’s been stolen
So much has been lost
Too many people not caring
So many faces in those seats on Sunday
Blank staring
Children looking like their days are numbered
How many Sundays
Seats empty because others chose to slumber
Wake up like you just heard some Thunder
Lightning open up the eyes of the Hunter
Take back by force what’s been violently stolen
Get angry for your brother who’s suffered such torment
Go to him and kick out all the squatters
Speak words of hope and healing
Be your brother’s keeper and not a doormat for others
How can I be full of it?
I have grown up in church
Paid my dues
I felt
Was a good person
Born again
Baptized
What you are telling me
My head is calling lies
I’m fine
Just don’t put me in a predicament
The other side of me
Jeckle and Hyde
In my own strength I have tried
Denying the facts
Pursuing more tact
Somehow thinking this world’s therapy
My answer to a sorry fake of being free
Not going to fool myself again
Much of my struggles started
Young and weak
The damage started to begin
Somehow put it away
Hid it and hoped to never surface to the light of day
The truth is a bucket of pain
Humiliation and shame
Blame and anger boy how they maimed
A fragile soul who longed to be hugged
Alone many times
Walking away, my shoulders give a shrug
How many people out there today
I wasn’t alone in this journey
I wish we could have met
We could have come together to pray
Are there any out there that are free?
Churches filled with souls
Chains dangling beneath their knees?
My God has revealed to me who I am!
Against me, no weapon can stand!
The key is to never put aside
The armor He gave us to wear
The sword and shield by our side
Stop talking about putting it on
If you never really took it off
A lot less of your success would be gone
Righteousness today
A bad word to many
Too tall an order for churches to ask their occupants to pray
Read your Bible daily
It is a burden some say
I can’t afford to go without it 1 day
Start praying for others
Job learned this
I can sum it up in one word OBEY
It is OK to admit when you are wrong
Been wrong long enough
It’s time to turn from what’s wasting your life
Start right now
Read about who you are in Christ
Get rid of those inhabitants
Fill up those empty spaces with God’s Holy Spirit
Get freer by the minute
Tell others there is another life worth living
Freedom comes at a cost
But, Oh what a feeling!
By: Joel D. Harris
Friday Afternoon
It’s Friday afternoon
I’m tired
My back hurts
I don’t want to be sitting in this car
It’s hot
It’s stuffy
The winds not blowing on me enough
I look into my lunch bag
I see the same old stuff
I want to be at home
Alone
Take a shower and lay in bed
Clear my brain of all the things
Too many things waiting on me
All I want to do is
Be
Stuck in the rut of my daily monotony
I know I’m not the only one
But knowing that still doesn’t help me
Sometimes I wish I had a job
A duty to just exist
I would like to just drive around town
Go to the park and sit down
Catch up on all that reading
I really miss that feeling
I have to say that this daily existence
Sucks a lot my passion out of me
I still want to take
A big can of red paint
Go to a white wall somewhere
Toss a bunch of it at it
Get it everywhere
See what cool designs come of it
Take more of it with my hands
Smearing it and wiping it
Creating cool shapes and signs
Outta nowhere
You should try it!
Feeling better already
As free as a bird
I thought I had lost it
Forgotten my destiny
Living too long in a life of misery
Life gets so busy
I have to say it makes my head feel dizzy
I would like to raise my voice out loud and say
“Hold on here!”
What’s all this busyness about?
Can you answer me this
Could we live without some of this?
I wouldn’t doubt
How I really do enjoy
Just being in the company of others
Reminding me of times when I was a little boy
Sitting and sipping some Lemonade on my porch
Talking about whatever thoughts
May come our way
No worrying about tomorrow
Each choosing to live in today
Taking a deep breath in
I grin
Tomorrow is not guaranteed
That is another rut you are in
Feeling that if you live in the moment
It’s a sin
So why choose today to rush
Let your mind be freed
Tell your busy brain to hush
It’s only one day a week
You get to enjoy it
Don’t miss out on the opportunity
Think out of the box you’re in
What do you have to show for it?
Choose to take a break at
Like me today
On this Friday Afternoon.
Written by: Joel D. Harris
On my lunch break at
FRIED CHICKEN
Um um, ummmmm
Ohhh yaaaaah
Yum yum yum
Fried Chicken on my mind
Crispy, crunchy and warm
Just been fried!
It brings a smile
Smile on my face
Face dripping with BBQ sauce
My messy hands, what can I say!
All sticky and sweet from my chicken
Oh, I love fried up chicken
It makes me want to sing!
Such a simple home cooked meal
It’s driving me insane
Kicked up with some
I eats my chicken
With taters and slaw
Oh, and after I’m done
My tummy, it’s thankin
So content with my chicken
Just finished a pile of fried chicken
Bones is all that’s left to be lickin
Oh, God thank you for making the chicken
I think I’ll take a long long nap
And dream of my fried chicken
You must think I am trippin
Theres nothing like
A fried chicken.
Oh, yaaaah!
By: Joel d. Harris
July 25, 2003
God is not mad at you
God is not mad at you
it’s the absolute opposite
what your mind is telling you
don’t believe the lie
I’m telling you
The truth
I’m saying this to save you
God’s love has nothing to do with how you feel
How you dad or mom treated you
Right now just trust me, I’m being real
I know you’ve been hurt real bad
If you told me just one instance
I’d be truly sad
See the God above
he cares for you
With so much love
You and I can’t contain what love he’s made up of
He’s got true love for you
Why are we all still thinking
This or that is happening to me
God he’s just mad at me
I’m just getting punished again
I’m steady trying to figure out
Who, what, where, or why I sinned
Which dad or mom’s mistakes I’m paying for
This idea of my almighty god
An error
the deceiver
he’d like my mind to explore
Well I’m not buying it
Other Christians out there daily trying it
Tired of people giving up on life
Saying their sickness is from god
Now that’s a lie!
The devil’s got you tricked
No threat to him
You might as well have already died
Yes you’ve been licked
You say to me
I’m just a sinner who’s been forgiven
I’m telling you who you are
A Christian
See yourself how God sees you
And It will lead to righteous living
See god took out all his anger on calvary
It pleased him to see his only son beaten
He smiled because it wasn’t me
Now you got life eternal
It’s time for you to start living
Stop thinking you’re a criminal
His word says his kindness won’t depart from me
Promises of peace I can have eternally
God himself says these things
He told me he’ll have mercy on me
Because mercy’s here
Don’t think it wise to keep on sinning
You’d grieve the holy spirit
But it’s your life
Now walk on
It’s time to start rightly choosing
God wants us to live life in freedom
His abundant love came down from up above
The gift he gave to us is free
He came to break the chains of yours
To set the captives free
No pain, sorrow, grief, or torment
He doesn’t give you these
He promises abundant life for you and your family
So picture this
One big daddy’s lap
Asking you to hop up on it
His arms are open wide to hug you
There’s peace in his presence
At a moments notice
You can be there abiding in his stillness
So stop thinking defensively
Accept his love with open arms
I can see him now and he’s smiling at me
Keep on your armor daily
Use his word
It’s a two edged sword for you to use wisely
For the devil comes
To take, to kill, and to destroy thee
Stop blaming god for things
Read your bible more
Pray his word
Keep your mind on higher things
Rest assured
He loves you
He’ll keep his word
His loves so deep that he has for you
Don’t believe the lie
My god, he’s not mad at you.
By: Joel D. Harris
12-19-04 at 10:06pM
GOT FEAR?
What are you afraid of?
Are you afraid to step outside?
Hesitant to look on the inside?
Who and what would you find?
So many mysteries
Got you knocking at your knees
Living in a society wrought with fear
Bound at its mouth
At it’s hands
And at it’s feet
Helpless it seems
A waste of a life
Like a house full of dope fiends
Fear is advertised you see
Glamorized on Reality TV
Everyone’s aware of the viruses lurking here and there
Anointing yourselves deceptively
With your Anti-Bacterial soaps
Your Bleach
Sipping your herbal New Age Homeopathic remedy
Sin is sin
To live in Fear is to exist in torment
Has our God somehow ceased to exist?
Items that aid us in dealing with our daily fears
Fill our shopping lists
No money left for tithe or offerings
Pastors pleading with their people
There’s kids in foreign countries desperately needing
Your money
How am I supposed to free my brother?
We share the same cell in this nut house
Something is wrong with this picture
Gideon’s Bible collecting dust on a table
Dare we crack it open once?
Read about a God that is able
Were so afraid of what man may say
What he may think
Choosing to order the same drink
Because were afraid to stand up for what we believe
For if I didn’t do it, what would they think?
Our focus is on saving our own hide
Hiding we are, because of our stinking pride
Been afflicted with all kinds of things
Yes, me.
From my skin to my intestines
I can attest to having all kinds of weird things
No peace I had within
The doctors couldn’t make sense of me
Whatever happened to going to the elders of the church?
Asking their help in getting free
Our doctors are now our shepherds
Witches they are
Keen and crafty decepters
Many seeking people out there
Wanting to feel apart
They fill our local lodges
Being fed deception
A terrible counterfeit for what God wanted to start
The wisdom of man gone bad
Smoke and mirrors
Contracts made in secret
Resulting in eternal separation
And a life lived in fear
Will I live my life dependent on a medicine cabinet full of bottles?
Slave to this master of side effects and drug induced horrors
Someone wake up here and notice
Our prayers aren’t getting answered
Because we don’t believe our God can heal us
All we want is healing, but we still choose to live in sin
We are wasting our time and our bodies are rotting from within
Fear has been our taskmaster long enough
A healthy dose of the reverent fear of the almighty God
This is what we need the most
We have been rebellious and prideful long enough
God is calling a nameless, faceless people
He needs them to do His work
Count the cost, because this work is tough
Lord, help us to live in the freedom that You created
Fear left in our wake
Rising up in the morning
Ready to fight the good fight of faith
Forgive us of our lack of truth
Those who are willing will seek it, they will be the chosen few.
By: Joel D. Harris on
Grandma Jane
Grandma Jane
That’s her name
Full of color
Listen up
She’s got something to say
She loves to read
Enjoys to write
She has got a lot of stories
Lived a long, good life
Her favorite color is blue
Her favorite animal says moo
A collector she is
An expert in just making do
She covers herself with bright clothes
Bracelets made of turquoise
Sparkly rings on her fingers
Comfortable shoes on
Open, so you could see her toes
Her outlook on life
Quite simple
Sit down
Take a load off
Let’s lounge around
Just watching people
She is an encouragement to many
Simple wisdom
She gives out
Uncommon Beauty
Most of all, she enjoys the company
Oh, how Jane loved music
Played the piano
Loved to dance when she could
Loved the Lord
She would tell people
God is good
An inspiration to her family
A true friend to many
Grandma Jane
A beautiful person
Now what is left?
A memory
One look at her
Peace was the word that came to me
She lived a good long life
In this world
Full of stress and anxiety
A lesson to be learned
From my dear old granny
Trust in God
Keep life simple
Enjoy your life with the company of many
Grandma Jane
We all will miss you
Taught us much
We enjoyed all the times we spent with you
No one could ever replace
My favorite grandma
A gentle soul
A blessing to all
Grandma Jane
By: Joel D. Harris on
Dedicated to Ruth Jane Earnest – died 4-6-04
Heaven
Heaven.
Beyond life . . .
In time,
Patiently I wait . . .
Awakened!
Seeing the moon and planets,
Peace calm me . . .
-by Joel D. Harris
Hemor Oh.. Oh.. hoids
Ouuuuch!
My eyes are squinting shut in pain
Pain like this is crazy!
Does something damaging
To my brain.
Hoping the pain will soon reside
Something nudging me
Relief found
In losing my stinking pride
I can’t sit
I can’t sleep tonight
I’m in an irritable kind of mood
My family looking puzzled at me
They ask me “What’s with you?”
It’s hard to drive
That half hour commute I have
Misery on wheels
I feel like the only road to happiness
If I had died
I feel like I am going to weep
Would anyone care if I cried?
Nothing helping me in my pain
Only comfortable it seems
Hunched over a pillow
On my knees
Now my knees are in pain
What a shame
Who’s to blame
Feeling like I got a mushroom cloud
Forming behind me
Ready to explode
I’m feeling all stressed out
Trying to smile to all those around
Embarrassing doesn’t come close
Feeling like I’m the only one
This pain has inspired me
You’ll see
As you read what I wrote
I’ve tried all the lotions, creams and ointments money could buy
Covered myself clear down
To my knees in it
Sat on pillows shaped like
Donuts and big letter C’s
Flat out of ideas
Broke
And not enjoying it
Somebody help me in my misery!
My wife, she says I’m stressing out
Get over it, she says
Relax
Get in touch with that quiet
Other side of my life
Nothing is worth all this fuss
Keep on this path your going
You’ll find yourself
With a one way ticket
For that big white van
On your way to the funny farm
Wake up man!
Did I not eat enough fiber today?
Am I sitting too much at work?
Do I need to drink more than
8 glasses of water a day?
These questions circle in my head
They fool with me
I don’t need this
I’ve been stressing out enough!
I have to have a long talk
With myself
Telling me to chill out
Go to bed early if need be
You can’t do it all
Enough evil packed into today
Worrying about tomorrow
Just asking for a life of misery
Put off a little
What you believe is needed
Stop trying to impress others
Life is too short.
This lesson needs to be learned
Somehow
Stop trying to be what you aren’t
Doing what you really can’t
Being stupid and not smart
Thinking all eyes are on you
When you realize they aren’t
Finding yourself alone
Hyper-sensitive
The outcome of it all
A whole lot different
Than you had expected
Stop jumping the gun
Make up an excuse if you have to
Take a walk
Take a trip to the John
Do something relaxing for a change
Talk
Release all that bad stuff inside
You’ll find
That you can still be strong
Take one good look at yourself
And start to laugh!
Loosen up man
Holding all those feelings inside you
This doesn’t make you a man!
You’ll be left with a faint heart
High Blood pressure
Popping pills like a dope fiend
That is no life to live
If you have to let out a scream!
Soon those Hemorrhoids will deflate
The stressing will reside
Man, you are ready for a break!
I bet you can’t wait
Just remember
Appreciate how your life is without
Do some internal inventory
Clean house
Life is better when you learn
Those things to avoid
There is nothing like
A good old
Hemorrhoid.
By: Joel D. Harris
Inspired on
How I Feel Today
My smile is tired today
Is it the lack of sleep?
Could it be this slow work.day?
I feel like complaining
But why?
The skies aren't even gray!
Somedays I feel
Things are going too good
Want to go home sick
Just cause I know I could!
Longing to be somewhere fun today
The same old stuff
I get tired of seeing it
Day after day.
I'm screaming inside!
I swear that I am.
You haven't heard a peep
outta me all day long
Can' t seem to muster up
the strength
Does today show how timid I really
am?
Introspectively I sit here
In my car again
My brain feeling hollow and empty
Yet I hear a commotion
As if from afar?
For some odd reason
I wish this day would end
Maybe tommorow will just be different
Today I feel like I am snacking
on a can of Spam!
It cracks me up inside
I sit there daily working
No one noticeing
The wild emotions I'm feeling inside
of me
I can truly say
I put on quite the show
Smiling to those I meet daily
While many times inside
My skies are a dreary gray
It can be dangerous ground
When you are candidly real
You might offend someone!
People might point their fingers
Some may run away in fear
I'm dying to be real for a day!
Oh, how memorable that day would be
Needing to be like a kid
Just to have fun
I feel like I've forgotten how to play!
Step out and enjoy how you're feeling
Even if your insides start reeling
Get out of your daily rut
Maybe today you'll try something
different
Why not ?
And so what!
By: Joel D. Harris
ON
AT
I Don’t
I don’t like this
Never wanted to try this
Feeling so helpless
Desperately looking for wellness
Deep inside I am seeking
Pointless to keep existing
Much more to my living
A lot bigger than me and mine
Why do I waste so much time?
Wondering why
I don’t want to cry anymore
Feeling that I’m ignored
Searching and knowing there’s more
Why can’t I just exist?
Please, I can’t resist
This story’s got quite a twist
So simple, it’s easy to miss
Patiently waiting for it
I don’t believe it’s true
Something wonderful
Brand new
Never would have expected it
My wildest dreams
Couldn’t have predicted it
Blowing me away again
I’m speechless
Stand in awe of your loving-kindness
A love like this leaves no doubt in me
What I don’t understand
You show me
I don’t want to doubt anymore
I don’t want to question you Lord
I don’t want to worry about more
I just want to say
Men may say you don’t exist
But I don’t
By: Joel D. Harris
I NEED TO EXERCISE
Exercise on my mind
Today’s topic
Running through my cluttered mind
The truth is
My body would rather unwind
Ask yourself
Are you really fine?
Used to living life for fun
We pleasure ourselves at any cost
Life’s a big pink donut box
Oh! I think I’ll have another one!
Even when a heart attack is on the Horizon
Not to worry, the doctor can brew me
Another chemical, magical concoction
What’s the use to stop the abuse?
A day in this life here on earth
No need for self-control or conscience
To me that’s just an inconvenient noose
This world has got answers for all my daily ills
It sees no need for a God
Now you’re working two jobs
Just to pay you’re rising medical bills
Is this really the way we ought to live?
Isn’t there a dusty book on your shelf?
Telling you the where, when’s and how’s to live?
Or are we just too lazy
To exercise our beliefs
Just like our bodies
Our spiritual lives lay dormant
In our homes in heaps
I know I gotta do what I gotta do
Finding the time
Another day passes, another month
Again I blew it
Not even trying
What is up with me?
Why does it gotta be
So complicated
For me to be dedicated
To the simple task
Of exercising this body of mine
This is frustrating!
This old body of mine
Needs some good old educating
P.E. for the M.E.
To lose some of this excess weight
No more holes left on this 5 Foot long belt
I simply can’t wait!
What is wrong with us people?
We just keep eating
Not moving much
We don’t burn any calories
With our Bachelor’s Degree thinking!
Brothers and Sisters dying at the age of 30!
Hearts failing them
From one more super size meal they eat
This stuff is killing them!
The hardest part
For me was just to start
Exercising in a program
Making myself do it
Like the Little Engine that could
I think I can, I think I can
I felt a whole lot different
Worth all the pain & sweat that comes with it
I no longer see myself as invincible
This body of mine
I’ve read about
It’s supposed to be a temple
In a delicate balance, I have learned
Easily brought down and humbled
By being flat out irresponsible
I’m learning daily in this life
Natural and Spiritual
Self-Discipline is a very important principle
The good habits in life
They have to be daily exercised
Don’t come free, I’ve come to realize
Whatever you need to do
Buy a new outfit
Get up earlier everyday
Loose some sleep
You had been getting
All of this is worth the sacrificing
For the new you
To see it
You got to open up your eyes
So if you have yet to begin
Roll up those sleeves of yours right now
Write a new page in this book of your life
In the end
You win!
Don’t listen to your lazy body’s lies
I’m telling you now
I’m now convinced of the fact
For me at least
I need to exercise!
By: Joel D. Harris
On
Life J
Slapped in the back
I coughed up some hack
Gasped to get my breath
First shot at life
No, this is not your death
Getting poked and scrubbed
Can’t wait till all is done
Can I have some fun?
Can’t do nothing for myself
Dependent on everyone else
This early taste of life
A struggle from the start
Now I’m a teen
Feeling awfully mean
My face so ugly
It even bleeds
Can’t get along
My parents often gone
Out to fend for myself
Where do I go for help?
Just want to be myself
Still struggling with the cards
The cards that I’ve been dealt
As a married man
Three kids, a wife,
and a mini-van
Watching time as it goes
Quicker now that I am old
My struggles
They unfold
Even more it seems
Fill the garbage can
Oh, there’s my dreams
Got to be kidding me
These troubles bite me like fleas
End up on my knees
Guess what?
Now I’m old
To just get up
A struggle not to fold
Life is not a breeze
Arthritis?
I got it in my knees
Looking up to heaven I plead
What you waiting for?
I want to leave!
Don’t want to struggle for this
Worked all my life
Let me have some bliss!
By: Joel D. Harris
Look Up & Smile
My eyes open at dawn
Awake now, I rise up from my bed
Still at peace
My mind starts its daily work
Yet it’s calm
I say to myself
Look up and Smile
Thankfulness wells up like water
From deep inside of my being
Your faithfulness
It comforts me
Kindness and mercy never-ending
I’m caught up in this blissful daydream
All I can mutter is
You are so Awesome to me
To sit and be still just to hear Your voice
My favorite place to be
You whisper in my ear
How much You love me
One of Your favorites
Showing me that loving You
What real success truly means
You are so powerful, mighty and wonderful
Humbly I bow my head
Admitting my weakness
I sing a song aloud about your awesomeness
No, I’m not intimidated
Instead, I’m elated when I think of You
Wanting to do all I can
Become the man
You intended for me to be
Loving You creates in me purity and holiness
Qualities I never dared to pursue
A lifestyle that will benefit many
My family and friends
Whether they be many or few
Tough times past
Wasted a lot of time dwelling on it
Put into perspective
Telling me to get over it
I learn of Your objectives
Now aware of the daily battle
I read my marching orders
Count the costs
I make sure I’ve put on my armor
You wink at me
Telling me whose got the victory
No longer a victim
But a Victor
Oh, how my mind used to overwhelm me
Thoughts of my past faults
Where I struggled
Trying to convince me of my frailty
I look forward and not behind
Kicking out all those heavy burdens of insecurity
These thoughts in the battlefield of my mind
I look to what You’ve done for me instead
How far I’ve traveled from the past
The changes You’ve begun in me
A glorious difference that can be felt
Deep inside this home
Me
Forget about trying to figure out
How a present mess I’m in
Will eventually pan out
I lift up my hands as high as I can
Screaming as loud as my voice permits
“ I can’t do this on my own and all alone!”
“Help me!”
I have found no answers from the wisdom of man
The God factor is desperately needed
I can see Him now smiling from up above me
He nods and says, “ I’m your man”
Enough time wasted
Doing things my way
His ways are perfect
His thoughts much higher than the criticism of many
I surrender my will to thee
I’m ready to lie down in green pastures
Ready to be comforted and loved
All of this encouraging me to
Look up and smile.
By: Joel D. Harris ON
Mama
Mama
You put a smile on my face
Fell cozy and warm
When I am in your embrace
I look up to you
In various ways
Always nice to see you
Wish you weren’t so far away
You’re life has not been easy
Been filled with all sorts of pain
You never gave up
Even though you’d had enough
Sometimes everyday
I admire that quality in you
It’s what I remember often
When my skies are gray
Mama didn’t give up
If she did
I wouldn’t be here today
My Mama worked real hard
Rolled up her sleeves daily
Boy, she slaved
For all us kids and Dad
We noticed it most
When she was gone
Or laid out sick
Hoping she’d get better soon
That is how we prayed
Mama was always so colorful
Crazy ideas she had
Baffled even her kids
With college educations
She learned from her Mama
Ways to make do in life
We kids would look around
Thinking we had nothing at all
Creative, Mama is
She is not afraid of nothing or no one
Even Dad would step aside
Many times we all would
There Mama goes again
She’s up to something
Mama prayed
She meant it
Read her Bible daily
And lived it
She would talk to any old stranger
Unafraid of them and what they thought
Told them how Jesus gave it all
Though not one of us deserved a penny of it
Mama could look at a scrawny old tree
Talk to it
Prune it down many times to a stump
Water it
A season later
Watch it
Transformed before all our eyes
Another one of her amazing projects
Mama taught me to love people
Watch them for fun
Enjoy the company of many
Or appreciate the company of one
She cared about them all
Would give the shirt off her back
Just to warm a cold, lost soul
My Mama taught me to be tough
Raised me like a baby eaglet that I was
Cozy at first
Then taught me a lot about life
Made sure I was ready
For the tough reality of it
Sometimes Mama it felt like you didn’t care
But now in retrospect
It was the only way to raise up a man
In this world that keeps pressuring me
To just give up and cave in
My Mama is like a rose to me
She is beautiful
Yet she’s also got a tough stem
She is thorny in places
You’ll learn this if you cross her
Yet she is a prized possession to me
And to all those who adore her
You remind me of your favorite place to be
The ocean
It is fresh, clean and free
Sailing along like a seagull
Sun sparkling off your eyes
Like the wind
Who can contain you?
How can a poem like this
Even come close to explain thee
The uncommon working wisdom you possess
The Godly confidence
That I see in you
On me has been impressed
Hold onto these
And forever you will live free
Mama
Your arms so big
Your heart so deep
Forever a mother
A loving friend
A precious gift to me
I appreciate all you are
You have been so much to me
I love you
With all sincerity.
Happy Mothers Day Mom ! By: Joel D. Harris
My ears are ringing
My ears are ringing.
It is raining outside.
It is cold inside.
My feet are numb.
My nose is running.
I don’t feel anything.
Scratching my head.
Wondering if,
Wondering when.
It will all end
How long
How far
Do you know?
Do you care?
Crying in my sleep.
I now lie awake.
Wondering why me .
All alone.
Where are you now?
There you are!
Beside me the whole time.
Sometimes I just don’t know!
It is time to go home now.
Over and out!
Joel Harris
Dictated and the computer typed the words. Cool!
MY FATHER
Daddy
I love you
The love I have for you is bitter sweet
I need you today
Whether I am very young
Or when I am old and my hair is gray
Reaching out
Reaching up
I stretch my arms many times desperately
Hoping you will run to me
With your hands outstretched
Can’t say I always appreciate what you offer me
Not the candy coated reality or warm embrace
Like Mommas way
I know you love me
That look in your eyes
I know you care
How much you care is many times clouded
My own needs and wants and cries for help
This puddle of tears I lay in
Confuses me at times yet I know I feel safe in your arms
Every year that passes
Your character , Your face, Your words
They click in my head
Those days I feel like I’d be better off dead
I see you shake your head
That is not the way
You taught me different
Yes, I have a hard head
Doesn’t mean I didn’t listen or believe you
When I haven’t seen you for a while
I wish I did
The anger I felt from you at times
All mixed up with love, fear and lots of emotion
Neither of us would turn around and walk away
I see myself in you
You say the same to yourself
Knowing what will happen next
Made from the same mold
Thought someone had broken it after it was made
Can’t help but love you and pray the best for you
The hardest part of being a Dad
Letting your children live their lives
Unable to stop them
Going off the edge
Bumping their head
Ending up dead
Only able to hope and pray
What kind of creation is this
Able to screw things up on their own
A will of their own
Skies able to turn dark gray
Waters come to wash their lives away
Loving them enough
Sending them a savior
Leaving them a choice to choose
A life to lose
If they feel like it
Spending their lives in a long snooze
Harvest sitting in the field
Waiting to be taken and to be used
Asking them whatcha gonna do
I’m coming back for you
When I return what will I see
Will I be a proud father?
My Father may not have done it all right
Used might that didn’t help me sleep better that night
I toss and turn because I know he cares for me
Easier to hug my momma
Your love sometimes confuses me
Not always looking out for my comfort
Don’t always feel your sympathy
I have to live in this tough world
You don’t seem like you are out to rescue me
Is it up to me to figure out these questions inside of me?
Want to be your friend
Love to talk to you about everything
Want you to be proud of me
I love you so deeply
I hope you know it is my one goal in life to love thee
In your big peaceful arms
Nothing can surpass the way I feel
Able to relax and give it all to you
You show me glimpses of what really matters in life
Show me what great things you have for me
My Father
My Friend
Give me love for my earthly Father
Know you were with me
In all I have been through
You cared at all times
Never forgot me
No substitute could ever replace
The one who cares and loves
Beyond my feelings or my circumstances
I still believe in you
This is written from the heart of a boy
Still seeking the love of
My Father
By: Joel D. Harris written on Fathers Day
My life a mystery
Life sometimes makes me want to cry
These trials I have to go through
So beyond me, so only You
I have faith in You
Many times, many days I want to just say goodbye
I believe, atleast I try
So much I don't understand
It makes me tired if I try
Why, I ask?
You tell me to be still and wait, but walk on
My mind starts to race
Should I go here or there
Do this or that
Maybe it will help the time move fast
The pain in me sometimes, when I choose to venture in
Beyond me, So, so only You know
Only you can relate with such pain
You gave your only Son
Sent Him to die for me
So undeserving, such a crazy thing
To understand your love
I'll spend my life trying to accept this grace
Is it because I am mere dust
A passage on a page of this book of Life
You ask me to give everything and trust You
I hold so dear what's mine, but it's all Your's anyway
None of it has ever comforted me
It smothers me and yet I still take comfort when I think I have it
My future
So many years spent running after, fighting after an idea
An idea I bought into, like a late night infomercial
My goals, my dreams now
So simple, such little pressure in it
I'm a new man, but a baby
learning and stumbling through it
I yearn more for closeness
Like a baby grasping to catch a glance
from it's parent
I feel so helpless, so empty, so needing You
to guide me
Holding onto Your promises as Deeds of ownership
All I can do is walk, and trust and look up
Thank You for keeping me guessing
I guess this is what You call really living
By: Joel D. Harris on
Not My Body
I’m a Black Man in a White Man’s body
Raised in
Till I was almost 30
Enjoyed the culture and food
Of my brothers and sisters around me
But never quite accepted
Not honestly invited to their party
I stuck out like a piece of lint
On a photocopy
I almost married
A dark skinned twin hottie
My wife said it’s hard to forgive me
I was in love once
With someone she could never see with me
I love the black man
I love the black woman
I can eat Red Beans and Rice
Mac and Cheese and Cornbread Stuffing
Please pass the Collard Greens
I learned to appreciate
Those different from me
I could sing the blues
With the best of those around me
Have some stories of my own
Gone through my own persecution misery
Because of the color of the skin on me
I learned to adapt
My appearance, my words, my sympathies
It is sometime the only thing that saved me
But when it all is said and done
I was told to just be me
Sometimes I think
I am a black man in a white mans body
By: Joel D. Harris on
114
Off To Work
Oh, Oh, Oh
It’s off to work I go
Oh my job
Like Job
What a misery
8 hours I spend with thee
Lord it’s drudgery
Can’t wait to get home
Nurse the wounds of my sanity
Many times letting depression
Get the best of me
Oh, I want to be free
How many of you out there
Feeling just like me?
Free from these chains
They try to bind me
From the top of my head
To the tips of my toes
Oh, I just want to go
Oh, if you only knew how so
It can’t keep me from dreaming
The goals and aspirations are a mounting
I get excited thinking of the day, I pray
I’ll be turning in my chains for some wings someday
Oh, how I will fly away
Far away from today
Will you look back?
Some may say
Only to grin from ear to ear
I’ll then say, I lived in misery too long
Now I’m gonna follow a better way
Those things on paper I scribbled
Hoping someday I would see them be
A future more fitting
More fitting for a dreamer like me
You gotta have vision if you plan on moving
I could have stayed like the rest
Blind to their reality
Remember misery loves company
I may be alone in this life
But I won’t have to say I never
Never felt how it was to be living
Now off to work I go again
By: Joel D. Harris On
Once Upon A Time
I wake up from a deep blue sleep
Stretch out my arms and legs
Wondering what’s to eat
As I rubbed my eyes
I was able to see
That beautiful woman
That gal who married me
She was still sleeping
Done away with counting sheep
She’s had a lot on her mind these days
Yes, she’s had quite a rough week
As she lays beside me
A thought comes to my mind
Once upon a time
When we were still young
Went for long walks in the forrest
Went to the beach
Just for fun
We’d stay up all night
Our family’s wondering what we’d done
We lived in our own little world
Each wrapped up in the eyes of the other one
Once upon a time
Nowadays life is full of stuff
Bills piling up here and under there
Diapers needing to be changed
Bottles waiting to be made
Little hands grasping at both of us
From here and over there
Sometimes we look at each other
Wondering if another day we could bare
Saying to each other
Keeping trudging on, Dear
Bedtime is almost here
Once upon a time
Footloose and fancy free
I finished running a marathon
In beautiful
I used to stay up all night
Listening to music about something
Just for the heck of it
I used to drive around town, more than once
Thinking in my head an idea would pop into it
Once upon a time
I’ve heard some men say
Don’t live in the past
But there’s nothing like the present
It will kick your butt
I’d rather live in the future
Thinking of something and somewhere better
Keeping my mind in the direction
Of where I’d like to be going
This situation I’m in can be depressing
I don’t appreciate that I am doing all this guessing
Wondering if and when I’d been wrong
Once or twice in life
Once upon a time
I met a beautiful woman
Stole my heart
Made me wear it on my sleeve
Her eyes they still do capture me
More than, Once upon a time!
-Joel Denver Harris
PAIN
Like the sharp sting of a paper cut
A sharp pang echoes in my gut
Here it comes again
Wondering if it will ever end
Like a cruel penalty
What have I done?
My head
It questions me
Not something I would wish
Even on my worst enemy
My life’s lot
My companion is Misery
Pain
Pain, please go away
I didn’t wish for you
Definitely not for today
Let me gather up my strength
It seems to have fled a thousand ways
I am helpless but to give into you
You sometimes take my breath away
Not long enough to kill me though
That wouldn’t be fun for you
Who would you have to torture so
I was a strong man
I think I still am
Haven’t had a chance to see these days
The skies I have been seeing
Painted dreary grays
Lord only knows
There has got to be better days
In this I hope
Hugging myself
Just to bare the pain
Is this how Job felt?
When all was taken away
Covered with sores
And left for dead
Some of his friends would say
But God spoke to Job in the storm
Showed him all that he had made
Asked him to answer Him
Tell Him why he was such a man
A man who should be spared pain
Job confessed that he knew who God was
He knew God could do anything
He later had everything he lost restored
Double
How about that for a new beginning?
All I know is pain isn’t forever
Just like the weather
Tomorrow may be better
But if it isn’t
Remember this
Pain is pain
We all have tasted it
Like a long distance journey
Eventually there will be an end to it
You have two choices
Let it beat you
Or you can beat it
- Joel D. Harris on
Rainy Day
Some days I feel like crying
I want to be happy
But feeling sad and lonely
Looking out my front room window
It’s stormy and scary outside
Not a man to be seen dead or alive
Got to get myself up
Wipe the tears that I never cried
Open the door
Grab my umbrella
Run out into the grey
Welcome another rainy day
Thoughts of huddling around the fireplace
Sipping something warm
The glow of the fire shining on my face
Comforted by the warmth of another
Things movies are made of
Sometimes seems too good to be true
Why do I always seem to return to the blues
It must be the weather
My attitude stinks like a wet German Shepherd
What can I do to climb out of this pit
This pit I dug for myself
I’m desperate for something better
Then I remember
God made the rain
He made the clap of the lightning
And the roar of the thunder
To grow all those pretty flowers
There has got to be some stormy weather
I’m already feeling better
Looking forward to the beauty
That comes later
These rainy days
They are times of reflection
Searching deep into the corners of my being
What matters in life?
This is the one question that keeps ringing
Lord help us get back to life’s meaning
Enjoy the rainy days of life
And most of all, don’t stop dreaming
If it is the weather that has got you screaming
Get out some bright colored paints and start brushing
If it’s not color that cheers you up
Put on some of your favorite music
Pull your feet up and start dancing
Don’t let a rainy day stop you from living
If all else fails put out your hand and start giving
When you find that the world isn’t made up of just you
Then no rainy day will bring blues to you
By: Joel D. Harris
On
Roar to War
Silence is broken by the sound of a roar
The earth around you shakes
A sound like this
It cannot be ignored
An anger so fierce
No enemy left
The taunting cutoff
Weapons of old lay on the parched ground
Futile against its opponent
I will not sit silent anymore
Scared of what you may say
You’re thoughts of me
They aren’t my problem anyway
The threat you posed
A mirage
Played into my insecurity
You thought you stole my destiny
Mistaken you are
Wide awake I am
Opening my dry lips
Deep in my belly emerges a ROAR!
Claws protrude from my paws
Amazed by them I pause and stare
All the time you’ve been growing under there
Hadn’t seen it because of all that hair
One swipe with these
Gone you are
No longer there
Feeling better already
Now akin to a Grizzly Bear
The change came almost suddenly
I stepped out with a hope
Tired of people walking over me
From now on get used to the new me
Everyday an adventure
Going to seize my destiny
I don’t care how far fetched
That destiny may seem
Already tasting sweet victory
No more mediocrity
Not going to live my life
By what I see now on TV
No boundaries
They cannot hold me
I got wings to fly
Over all that may try to stop me
Doing what I should have done
What had been taught to me.
No more frustration
No more anxiety
No more high blood pressure
All because I wanted you to accept me
No more wasted time
You and your lies
I’ve taken those blinders off of my eyes
Success is not defined
By what this world has to offer me
Boldly I step out in front of it all
Take a deep breath
From this new body
The new me
With all the passion left in me
I Roar to War!
With reckless abandonment
Leaving the old life of misery
Smiling from ear to ear
This is how life was meant to be
All should feel the rush of blood in your veins
Hear the sound of your breath
And learn to appreciate the pain
Nothing comes without a struggle
Get off you seat
Take off your muzzle
With all your heart
Join me in a ROAR!
There is nothing like a daily war!
-by Joel D. Harris
So Alone
A lonely man
I've walked this road before
Dry mouth
Stiff with fear
My insides tighten yet squirm
I hate this silence
Just as much as chaos
My ears feel like they will burst
I can't shake the smothering feeling
Alone in my room I lie awake
No one to touch
Not one who feels
Who cares
I can scream
What's the point
To scare myself even more
I am lost for words
Lost for the warmth company holds
I struggle so many times to just get away
Away I am and in a sad lonely state
Thinking at times all that matters is ME
I now regret the thought of such things
With company comes pain
Open yourself up
Take off your mask and show me who you are
Why do we run from such liberating things
How can I take comfort in my own embrace
My clammy hands sweat with the fear
The fear that I was wrong all along
So many years spent hoping to be
To not be alone again
Thinking I was the one puzzle with a purposeful piece missing
Oh, how I long to be with the one I love
All petty feuds of the past fall away like ashes
Is it the need in me to be needed
To be wanted as company for another
Even more true is for the one I love most
Oh, how I would plead for mercy
To be a servant for life to the one I never meant to hurt
I've heard mercy triumphs over judgment
This loneliness is killing me
My eyes need no sleep
My stomach needs no filling and my heart seeks no more pain
Come and return to me
I know your lonely just like me.
So Sick
I feel icky
My tummy it’s tripping
Oh my head, it pangs with pain
My legs go weak
Can I take another day?
I try to make the best of it
The toilet
I made a mess of it
Sometimes I can hardly breathe
The coughing brings me to my knees
I gasp for air
Looking up to the sky I ask
Do you care?
A blank stare
Does the look on your face say you care?
Why me?
Why know?
I need to be myself again
This misery
One of the lots of being a mere man
My nose runs into the pool of my tears
How many years past I’ve been ill
This time it really takes it’s toll
My weariness
Burdened by the lowliness of my spirit
It’s the worst part
I am saddened by this state of me
I forget what it was like
To be
I will truly appreciate
My health when it comes
Do you know when?
Wanting to give up
To quit all things important
Wanting to run from the hands
The hands grabbing to be fed
To be clothed
To have me for themselves
As if that would change anything
I would be a gonner
Consumed by the ones who love me to feed themselves . . .
By: Joel D. Harris
On
Sometimes life is like Soup
Life at times has its tough moments
Situations turn up the heat
Not giving you much notice
You find yourself washed up and out on a limb
Feeling into your pockets
All you pull out is some lint
You start to feel anxious, weak and confused
With the predicament you’re in
What’s a man to do?
Your tummy starts a rumbling
Looking up in desperation
You get an idea
Time to make some soup!
Soup doesn’t take much to make
A couple bucks
A small budget it won’t break
Something is far better than nothing
With a few left over veggies to start
Coarsely chopped and cut thin
Kind of how you’re feeling right now
You can’t help but relate to it
Bringing to your face a grin
Throw those tough vegetables
Into a heavy pot
Fill up the pot with some tap water
It’s not chicken broth, but it’s all you got
Set that pot onto your stove
Turn the heat up real hot and watch it boil
Cooking this may make you sweat
Just like most things in life
They don’t come easy and you can’t see the rewards yet
Feel free to add some meat
If you got any on hand
Cut the meat up like the vegetables
Real small pieces
You never know
This soup could be used to feed many
Many times in life I’ve noticed
Others like friends and neighbors
All in the same predicament
Use this as an excuse to invite them over
Share what you’ve got with others
Make this one of your lifetime commitments
You’ll be blessed far above your dreams
Don’t be selfish in tough times like this
It’s what loving your neighbor as yourself really means
Add some seasoning to taste
Whatever you have on hand
It’s those talents you’ve been given
Don’t put them to waste
Those little things in life
Take time and enjoy using them
Don’t be like others who live selfishly out there in the world
Living a life that to others tastes bland
You may need to add some rice or pasta
These additions expand in water
Giving all who eat of them a fuller feeling
Think of these additions
As the tender loving care you use when cooking for others
This soup is now a meal
This sustenance now has been made to last longer
You do what you have to do
Sometimes in life just to make it through
Making do isn’t all that bad
Some of the most enjoyable moments in my life
Like making soup for my family
Good times by all were had
You may ask me a question
Does this make you want to make soup everyday?
No, I’m afraid not.
The truth is, I usually make soup when I’m broke or sick
Not exactly what I relate to happiness
Many times losing my appetite
When I take leftover soup to work the next day
The soup comforted me and my family
Kept us warm, when in life we needed a break
Soup teaches me about my Lord who loves me
He never forgets about me
He knows what I need and want
Clothes me better than all the lilies of the valley
I don’t worry about me and my family starving
Even if we just break even every month
Rest assure, my God is watching over me.
Lord, help me not be like those in society
Working overtime with two jobs
All to be able to buy all the thrills and ills offered me
I’m not going to worry, be anxious, or angry
Thankful for what I’ve got
My God gives me a peace
The world outside my window
They can’t steal it from me
So if it’s soup today that I make
Or bread in the oven I choose to bake
I know I’ll be O.K.
My family and I are in good hands
Just give me my daily bread
That’s how I pray
When life sends you and yours for a loop
Don’t be afraid
Don’t be ashamed of yourself
Remember
Sometimes life is like soup.
By: Joel D. Harris
Storm Chaser
A rumbling echoes from a distance
A lightning crack
Shatters the silence around me
A sudden chill
Envelopes the air around me
Like the sound
Of a warriors drum
The beats
They beckon me
A rush races through my veins
Whatever else I was doing
I set aside now
Something in the distance
Attracts my gaze
My feet start moving
Guided by
A push within me
My destiny
Far away from now
To dive into
Some chaotic Mystery
Cold chilly drops of water
Pitter patter
On my head
Flattening my hair
Blurring my sight
Running into my mouth
As if to nourish me
For the fight
I run
Not walk
Towards the storm
Others passing me
As I make my way towards it
Wind pushing hard against my face
As if to whisper to me
Go on further
If you are crazy
Something inside of me
Pointing
The part of me
My life’s energy
Have to be true to myself
Tearing off this shirt of mine
Because it is doing more to hold me
Back from what I am meant to be
Getting closer to the danger
No fear
Safety is my stranger
Feeling like the one
Who is willing to die for someone?
No one else caring about
The lonely ones.
In the middle of the vortex
I feel
Something eternal has been revealed
To me
A truth that in many ways is complex
A call goes out
To those who run
In freedom
Beautiful secrets
Revealed to thee
A wondrous glory
Beyond any folktale story
Set apart
A few
For those who will start
Being different
From the careful many
It could be you.
So I run after
The storms I see approaching
Sometimes daily
Something inside me nudging
Always passing many faces
Shaking their heads
Babbling on their disgraces
Saying
How wasted is a life spent on others?
But Brother,
That is the secret
I’ve been called to be a chaser
A gatherer back of others
For that one that’s
Been given up by so many
Attracted to those lives
That to others seems too scary
To enter in
Even where angels dare not tarry
Seeking healing to begin
Knowing there is freedom
It comes from within
To break those chains around you
From deceptive sin
Who will go out?
And chase the storms
He needs to know now
Are you a storm chaser?
By: Joel D. Harris - on my birthday
Take Me Home
Take Me Home.
It’s my time to go
Been here long enough
At the end of my road.
My body’s tired
My mind is weak
Life’s not what it used to be
So many ailments
All my energy spent
Just to get from here to there
Lived the life of a mother
Played the role of the wife
Seen my children marry
Seen some of them divorce
Watched the grandkids grow
Husband died
Here I sit now
Quite alone
Life goes by now
Not much fun
Popping pills
My excitement
Found in what’s for lunch
Just waiting now
Having to be cared for
A burden chosen
By my faithful daughter
She made a vow
Not going to let me live alone
I’m happy to have a place to stay
This family’s life has been on hold
More than a decade
Caring for those in need
Lord, I know these things you see
Thank you for thinking of me
One day I fell
Hurt myself pretty bad
Probably broke my hand
It started to turn colors and swell
No one stirred
The house sat quiet
Don’t want to die alone
Had a bright idea
Might as well try it
I started to tap
The one hand I still got
Against my dresser
My face pressed on the floor
Lord, let someone hear me
Don’t let it be ignored
My son in-law
Awakened by the tapping
My daughter awoke too
Thank God they found me
The Lord’s mercy
Never ceasing to amaze me
Rushed to the hospital
Sirens screaming
Lights blazing
Checked me out
Without a doubt
This old shell of mine
It’s busted
Laying in a coma
I still trusted
God was on my side
My daughter read Your sweet word
Interrupted by her crying
You reached out your hand
Told me life’s end wasn’t in dying
There is a whole lot more of life
Up there flying
The first thing you did
Give me a big hug and a smile
I said thank God I’m out of that body
Lift up my feet and danced
Just like the good old times
Reunited with my man
Been so long
All I could do is grin
Told me he loved me and glad that I came
Wished he had been there with me
All the days I felt pain
Don’t cry for me children
Don’t shed a tear
Grandma is A O K
It’s wonderful up here
I know you will miss me
I will miss you to
Someday we will be reunited
Up above the sky so blue
Thank you Lord
Your grace never fails me
When I have lived long enough
I can stretch my hands up high
I know it’s time to
Take me home
By: Joel D. Harris
*Dedicated to my grandma:
Ruth Jane Earnest
who died on
The Daily News
It’s getting late
Almost 8
Can’t be late
Presses warming up
Getting ready to Print another day
Making History
Too many that work here
Another working day of misery
Yes, I work at the paper
It hurts me to say
My wife has done her time too
Both at times desperate for any work
Couldn’t find anyone hiring us in the day
Spending all my night here doing hard labor
My bed will lay empty another night
Hands black with newspaper ink
Sleep is something I savor
Back sore and saying to me I can’t take any more
All to print The Daily News
Slaves to the conveyor belt
While the public enjoys another snooze
My fellow laborers are a motley crew
Made up of young and old
Hey, you never know it could someday be you
Immigrant and college students
Retired folks who are too old for anyone
The society sees them as useless
Comrades we became, by sharing our daily hurts
Simple pleasures and earthly pains
Some of us wear all black
Piercings sparkle from parts of our bodies
Even our lips and our tongues
Tattoos speak of our pain and cover our backs
Our minds constantly under attack
Many of us half mentally gone
The outcasts of society
Choosing to work before the dawn
Whole generations of immigrant women
Somehow content to the minimum wage jobs
They have been given
None of them speaking the language of this country
Some of them coming to work daily
Exhibiting their bruises and beatings
Taken advantage of by their husbands
By society
There’s no sign that they are leaving
Working on this grand assembly line
Stacking and jogging papers is how they spend their time
Watching them work artistically
Over time they have perfected their movements into artistry
Somehow able to carry on passionate conversations
Amidst all the noise and busyness
I have to respect these people
I haven’t seen many workers like this in our nation
Time for a lunch break
Feel like running outta here
Never want to go back
But back I come daily
My body feeling like it is under a serious attack
We all snack mostly on junk food and 4 to 5 cups of coffee
Never drank so much coffee in my life
Makes you feel kind of crazy
We all discuss how this terrible job
It really sucks
We all agree we should be paid more
Yet no one willing to stand up for a people
A people that are tragically ignored
A break that seems too short
Leads to an early morning of working a whole lot more
The press supervisor decides to speed up the conveyor
We all pray to God this part of the job
Will soon be over
Thank God we made it through again
Now we all scurry around picking up papers and sweeping
Filling up giant garbage bins
We organize the left over papers
Pat each other on the back
Appreciating this team of hard laborers
We’ve done it again!
Wondering if the man and woman that morning
Will appreciate all the work that’s been done for them
Oh, I better not forget the people who deliver the news
Made up of College students
Single mothers who have brought with them all their broods
Men who owe so much on child support
Got to work another job delivering the news
Tossing papers is their sport
These workers are hard to watch
Their uniforms are made up of sweats,
Pajama pants and hooded coats
They rarely speak that much
Grunts and four letter words
That’s the foreign language of choice for such
Unhappy with their predicament
They throw their papers
Getting somehow some vengeful enjoyment
They line up with their trunks open wide
Tossing heavy stacks of paper inside
Grabbing handfuls of clear plastic bags and rubber bands
They gather in sections of the parking lot
Assembling the Daily News with quick working hands
Off they go tearing out of the parking lot
Nowadays they better deliver by
Or else they won’t be paid a lot
So when you sip your coffee in the morning
Look over the Daily News
Checking out what you could be learning
Remember that last night and this morning
Many hands touched your paper
A lot of busyness was going on while you were sleeping
Don’t worry
Keep on drinking that coffee of yours
Tomorrow will go on just the same
Like everyday goes by for the Newspaper worker
I hope you understand one thing
Only part of the news in daily life
Is what you are reading
There is a whole other world that goes on in the dark
Blood, sweat and many tears drip on that paper
Yet they don’t leave a mark
The Daily News
Handled by a nameless, faceless crew
Appreciate where your paper has been
Someone’s got to do the job
Could even be me or you
I hope this gives you a peak
You’ve learned something new
Now it will never just be
The Daily News
By: Joel D. Harris
Written
The John
Need
To
Must
Go
Now
Ahhhhhhh
Relief
Push
Hold
Relax
Grunt
Push
More
Plop
Splash
Grab
Tear
Wipe
Drop
Stand
Up
Stare
Reach
Flush
Slush
Gone
Bye
Dry
Open
Shut
Walk
Away
Work
Life
Hmm ……..
By Joel D. Harris on “the john”
This Hug’s For You
In Life there are some real good struggles
Been thrown quite a few curveballs
Hoped for something and been left with nothing
It’s not all that bad, it seems
Then I go to the mailbox
Look who’s coming after me
I try to keep my chin up
Though my smile is sinking low
Life ain’t no place for wimps
It seems sometimes I just can’t win
If any of this rings true
This hug’s for you
You may ask what kind of hug are you giving?
The kind that sweeps you off your feet
Come to rescue you from all of it
I’m sorry to lead you on to that notion
This hug’s telling you that you got to keep going
This is that part of life
You’re supposed to learn something
Playing this game of life
Nothing comes free
What kind of hug is this
Hasn’t helped my misery
Hugging is a lost art
It seems society has lost it
People not doing their part
We’re all so wrapped up inside us
It’s all about ME
Well guess what?
This big old world ain’t made up of just us
Lean over to your fellow man
Stretch out your arms and trust
You say to yourself this all sounds so new
Say to your neighbor
This hugs for you
All mighty God
Way up in heaven above
He’s looking down on all His children
Wondering what’s up?
Everybody is scurrying all around
Forgot what this short life of ours is all about
Worrying about our shrinking 401K’s
Looking at this world’s predicament
What a disgrace
Why do I see so many frowns on a face
If you decide to return to The Truth
Come to the one
He’s always been there for you
He stands there with his big arms outstretched
He’s telling you
This hug’s for you!
By: Joel D. Harris on
Troubled Soul
Troubled Soul
Pacing around the floor
Looking here and looking over there
Not happy with where you are going
Ashamed of where you’ve been
Searching for something absent
You’re race is yet to begin
Frustrated on the inside
Ugly on the outside
Run as you may
You tire yourself out
Refusing to obey
Rebellion burns inside your head
A month is the last time you went to bed
It’s amazing that you’re not already dead
Living on coffee and garbage you insist on being fed
Garbage in garbage out
Will you be able to eat yourself out?
The usual things
The things that used to satisfy
Now laugh flat in your face
Showing you their empty space
Shaking your head
You ask yourself why?
Why did I believe your lies?
Your conscience
Where is it?
Why didn’t you recognize
It was all a disguise
Paid for by your needy eyes
Wake up!
Get up!
The battle can still be won
Time to do what you should have done
One step in front of the other
Troubled soul
Listen up
Truth is your older brother
Take his advice
Be wise
Cut once after you measure twice
By: Joel D. Harris
Waiting
Waiting
Frustrated at times
Wondering how long
Trying to understand why
Seeking and finding more questions
No one can help me
Alone in this battle
I walk on wondering how much time has passed me
Why is it so hard for us to wait?
So afraid of what suprises may come
Thinking that our dreams won't match our fate
Worry painted across my face
Nothing ventured sees nothing gained
Stomach agitated
Hoping my reality is just a bad dream
Or something I ate
Delaying my frustration
Many times denying myself of emotion
Trying to be strong in this situation
Dont think there is anyone I can compare with
In this demonstration of patience
Still holding fast to the notion
What I am hoping for is an ocean
All I see is irritating drops on my head
From this unrelenting storm of inconvience
Will I remember these days
When life has carried me past these storms and skies so gray
Or will my mind below me
Attempt to hide the pain
You still point to it to show me
Hide the anxiety inside
Frustration quietly building inside my brain
A war forever being fought inside
Yet outside of me
Promising myself
Not going to give up till I am free
Growing so much and learning to get in touch with my insides
Waxing poetic, in my element
Lord I repent
This beautiful masterpiece made up of blood, sweat, many tears
Sleepless nights struggling with questions about Thee
Got all these gifts you have given me
Have them to give them
You ask me to offer them for free
Give me a glimpse of my destiny
No longer my life, but Yours
All of it making a whole lot more sense to me
Not about Me
All about You
I think I'm beginning to see
My hands reaching out to a sick and tricked society
Peace and hope laying on the ground
Trampled by my brother here and my sister there
They say You don't care
If they only knew how much You did for them
How quiet that room would be
Wanting so much to see the end of my labors
Asking to be paid, like I deserve to be much further
Looking at my neighbors stuff
Thinking all of it would make life less rough
Wishing I lived far, far away from those who prosper
Lord forgive me for being vane but regarding this poverty
I have had enough
Yelling at You Lord
Wishing I could shake my fist
Seeing those who have no food to eat
Those who are struggling
This should not be
If I had a million dollars I could save a few of these
Can You open up the sky and send a lightning bolt to tell me
I am here
Are you coming yet to rescue me?
This passion inside of me
Felling quite the fool
Have faith to move a mountain or two
Who will try to stop me?
Every time You bring me to my knees
You remind me that the wars to win
Needing to be fought on my knees
Letting you have Your will in me
Lord help me appreciate the time that passes
All the miracles to see you creating
Obedient to Your command to keep on
Waiting
by:Joel D. Harris on
WARNING
WARNING
A sign I see that stopped my eyes
What does it mean?
Is it really something dangerous?
I think it’s just trying to stop me
Something here is tickling my curiosity
A warning over here
Warning signs posted over there
Get outta my hair!
Trying to take all the fun out of me
Truth or Dare?
In me stirs some sick sort of despair
Knowing I would be too afraid
Afraid to step out into the unknown air
Picture this
Life with a message
Posted on it
WARNING
This world is not spinning around for wimps
I hear some of you moaning
Don’t get so scared
Just get over it!
Is WARNING only a sign?
To those who think they have experienced a lot in life
Let this be a reminder of wilder times
Ahead of us
Lasting only for some of us
It pays to learn from others in the past
Unfortunately I can’t say I‘ve done my best
169
Is everyone else so stubborn like myself?
I sometimes wonder how this world functions
Our pride getting in the way of progression
There are times we just must agree
Swallow our pride
Chocking us, is something on the inside
Accept a compromise with your Allies
Maybe this is what it really takes
To start learning to live as the wise
My brother sees the warning signs too
Stepping forward into it
Do I dare help him get through?
Or am I still stuck in the mud of my selfishness
Hugging myself in comfort
This is such sad deceptiveness
Two are better than one
One is bound to be blind sighted
By the enemy’s flaming darts
Forgetting the battle’s already been won
By the forces that prey on our weaknesses
The choice is up to you
What are you going to do?
Take up your shields and set out together
Can ten thousand enemies stop a united 2?
The tempting things this world has offered me
Many times left me wanting more
Lord, it caused me so much more misery
Your deceptive commercials were all lies to me
Deceived me into thinking
I had to spend all my time
Worrying about poor little me
While a world out there starves
Goes naked
No one caring to take away their loneliness
Gorging myself on all the delicacies
The world is one big all you can eat mess
Wake up you blind fool
The rest of us are drowning!
In a big puddle of your materialistic based drool
Warning
What does it mean to you?
It means a lot of things to me
I will never look at this sign the same again
It has left me to do a whole lot more thinking
By: Joel D. Harris
On
What Will It Take?
What will it take?
When will you break?
Stubborn as you are
You choose your fate
Don’t want to watch you
Stumble and faint
Can’t do it for you
Still love you the same
What is our problem?
Searching for something
Trusting in no one
Stuck in our problems
Sinking much deeper
Into a quick sand
Society
It’s got us
Running like rodents
Who’s gonna step off?
Stand up for others
Can’t just live silent
Who’s got the answers?
Sisters & Brothers
Can this be real?
Do you know how to feel?
We’ve lost our softness
Let’s all be honest
Caring less to help the rest
When will we pass this test
Choosing now to spend the time
Giving sight unto the blind
I don’t want to see another
Watching more suffer
Oblivious to others
Crying for a Mother
Those living with cancer
Lord, it’s not the answer
Dying on the inside
Hopeless looking on the outside
Who will get fed up?
Fight back or shut up!
Guide those who wander
To a hope that is sure
My God is Big!
My God is Strong!
He spoke into being
What was formless and void
Dust off your faith
Wake up and take
The tools you’ve been given
Destiny can’t wait
What will it take?
By: Joel D. Harris
You and I
My love of four years
How many tears have we cried?
How many joys in 3's we created
You and I
Had to be separated so many times
Not fair, it hurt so deep
I could hardly find the strength to cry
Having to live out our vows
So thoroughly
Like a test or reality TV series
We passed, we are winners to me
Just barely survived at times
Our love has got to be strong
100 proof or greater
Intoxicating at times
I've felt the love we've shared
Some would call it a crime
We've done our time
In these salt mines of our life
Been so mad at each other
But it is us we need
More than another
Been through too much
Too much with You, sister
I'll never leave you until
Until this body of mine withers
I'm still in love with you Baby
Don't mind the stretch marks
Don’t mind if you have gotten heavy
Not a day goes by
Me looking in that mirror
Telling myself you’re a blessed man
That woman still loves ya
After all the tripping and falling
I done messed up good and often
Don't look like a million bucks
I'm happy to take your 2 cents
Telling me how I'm lookin
You may not cook no food for me
Nor clean our house
Just having you beside me
It's all that is expected of ya
To have a true companion
You can have your dogs boys
I prefer my good lookin woman
I love how you call me out to play
Make this hard workin man
Go play catch and teach me something
Before I met you
I thought I knew it all
Had really experienced livin
But this roller coaster called Us
It's telling me
My future is bright with you
And there is still alot of livin
For me and you to be doin
The makeout sessions
Don't occur as often
Baby I'm always waiting
I sure hope that is you comin
Just to be with you
Our body's close as one
Me and You
Our hearts been sown together
From all the pain we've been through
People tried to take us apart
I wouldn't have changed nothin
You’re my best friend
Can't stand when I'm your enemy
You know Me.
Sometimes this plays with my sanity
Made sacrifices
The Both of us
Had to grow up quick
Seems like it has been really tough
Life has been hard on both of us
It's all worth it though
Go tie that hair of yours in a bow
Get ready for year number five
This time next year
I'll write you or sing you
Another Rhyme
I love you Baby
And not for the last time!
For our 4 year Wedding Anniversary to Shawna Marie Harris
The Love of my life!
By: Joel D. Harris
52/50
Entrapped in this skull of mine
I feel like no one cares about my end
Family, Friends and my Acquaintances
All fall to the wasteland
Police, Firemen and E.M.T.'s
Now all angry at me
By me no laws have been broken
All because one word
Spoken
Piddly me
Didn't know I was such a threat
To all of these
Why is it when they are wrong
Treating me and my brothers with no respect
So strong, they have to keep holding on
Their end is burning, smoking in the wind
Stubborn they are to the truth of the matter
To their own end
You are raising my blood pressure now
Ask any patient here
What rights we think we had
Think again, my friend
Where went the freedom of speech
Anger buring, yearning now from within
No water, no fire extinguisher can put this fire out
No effect on me, I'm ready to shout it out
Am I fighting who I really should be
Give me the white man with the suit and tie on
The one with the master plan
Is he the one backing up thee
I'm tired of seeing my people enraged by the system
Tied down like cattle, Lord knows my God is listening
We have been pushed, prodded, and cuffed enough
Been their now myself, and I'm no longer ready to take any guff
I've prayed for this day a long time ago
Now I'm here and seen it myself
Brother, this bomb inside is ready to blow
I've been battered, bruised and now I'm all alone
I pledge not to forget this place
The building named after a pioneer
A man who stood for freedom
Who believed in old fashioned Amazing Grace
You can keep me here
Indefinitely
You can't clip my wings
Can't bolt down this mouth of mine any longer
I will be free
You just keep up your wronging me
While I sit here and take notes of it
My court dates coming soon
I will be free
My Writ of Habeus Corpus
Still what I believe in
Free!
by: Joel D. Harris
After spending 5 days in a locked Mental Hospital in
Mental Illness
-Self Admit. A life changing experience and now the fools of today
just may have a voice!
ENOUGH!
Can’t sleep anymore
Something shaking me
A still, small voice in me starting to Roar!
I get up out of my bed
I know it’s late, but if I don’t do this
I’d probably end up dead
Sitting on the toilet now
Thinking maybe I ate something bad
Something inside tells me, NO.
I start to shake on the outside
Something rising up on the inside
My head hanging down
Shaking from side to side
Something is up here, and I am starting to see why
I realize I can’t go on like this anymore
This sad state of things
Accepting it for too long, only realizing it means more
It’s overdue
Time for me to rise up
Speak up!
When everyone around me chooses to shut up.
Looking at me with their eyes
Telling me to
Shhhhhhhh…..
I won’t be silent anymore
Time to walk out and shut the door
Enough!
I won’t continue to accept defeat
I’m not the failure you say I am
Failure is what you continue to repeat
Human beings they are
Seeing things that are not what they really are
Pointing without looking at the fingers
Pointing back
Look who’s on the attack
They don’t see the effects it has had on me
Tired of accepting this sorry idea of me
What audacity they have
Somehow thinking there is no one else watching
Hearing these opinions they have
I love you though, they say
As I walk away they stab me in the back
Does God see all this going on?
They may not think so
But I know.
How long Lord, must I endure this insanity
I know in this life of endurance and longsuffering
What I have to look forward to
Is peace in the afterlife of eternity
You remind me that vengeance is Yours
It’s not up to me.
I start to form together what I must do
A strategy
Looking at all the variables
Counting the costs
I feel the pain already
This pain isn’t new
Arising in me
I feel a confirmation of what I know I must do
I know that the mere act of standing up
Means I could lose everything
Is it worth it I say?
Will I end up alone?
Without a home?
No friends, no family?
But could I live with myself if I don’t do it?
Would that someone or someones later thank me?
Knowing on that day I chose to give up everything.
Standing up when no one else would
Didn’t do it, just because I could.
I choose to go through with it
My real family
Thank God are beside me
Only the grace of God
It wasn’t an easy thing
The attacks start coming
Especially aimed at me and my family of three
Me, my wife and child now under close scrutiny
Who is the one that’s been found out now
You or me?
Everyone trying to separate my wife and me
Here we go again, this bell has a familiar ring!
The devil is up to his old tricks again
Cheap shots of plenty he throws
But strong I stand
Most of the time alone.
But Big God is behind me.
Like Haman in the Bible
God sees
Haman’s death
At the hand of his own schemes
God sees the righteous and hears their cries
He sets aright the inequalities
He stands by those
Standing on the truth
The truth will set you free
What are you going to choose?
Those who stand up for the safety of others
Words I have lived by
Keep me strong and I am looking for faithful others
Are you willing to stand up if need be?
Forsaking friends, acquaintances and family?
Choose you now, then let it be.
The joker will laugh, for what he thinks is eternity
But when the jokes run out
The doors bust open and here rides in Reality.
Attention all you wife beaters,
Child abusers and molesters,
Thieves,
Liars,
Cheaters,
And all the arrogant sinners,
Enough!
The day is coming
Judgement is riding
The Great Book is opening
The cup of sin is spilling over
Noahs Ark is shutting it’s door for good
There is no more godly left, no not one
The victim will cry no longer
The martyr’s blood is making the murderer scared
They are now sober
A loud cry from above shouts at the top of it’s lungs,
ENOUGH!!!
-by Joel D. Harris
IN CONCLUSION
I hope you enjoyed this book of poems as much as I enjoyed writing them. I have to give all the credit to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I now know this is a gift that was given from my Lord to me to help me and others when in the midst of the battles of life. He has truly set a table before me in the midst of mine enemies and told me to eat up and be restored to health.
My God has never left my side and I am convinced that His thoughts of me are precious and many. This journey in my life, expressed by many of these poems, was a spiritual one. I have come to an understanding of biblical truths that were hidden from me earlier in my life. I see this artistic expression that He has given me, a beautiful example of Gods creative and wonderful awesomeness. I am left speechless at the simple beauty and yet complex workings of this world around me.
This poetry is not meant to convince you of Gods existence or that you should hold the same convictions or beliefs that I hold. I ask only that you keep an open mind and heart to what thoughts and feelings I have come to express in this book. Hopefully it has encouraged and enlightened you in some beautiful way.
In conclusion, I would like to invite you to start a new chapter of your life today. If you have been challenged that there is a spiritual side of you that is searching for truth, I’d like to lead you in the right direction.
Our God sent his only son, Jesus Christ, to live as a man and experience all that comes with life here on earth. God sent him to die on a cross and carry the burden of all the sin of everyone in the world past and present. It pleased God to do this, because it wasn’t you and me that were going to die on that cross. This shows how much He loves us. Jesus then after dieing for us, rose from the dead and created an opportunity for everyone here on earth to be able to have eternal life and be free from sin and its destruction. You can live a life of internal peace, freedom from the bondages that sin in your life has you in, and you can live a life of victory and true joy! All He is asking is for you to acknowledge that his son Jesus died for your sins and ask Him to forgive you for all the sins you have ever done. Choose to invite Him to come into your heart and your life and He will. The next step is to get a Bible to start reading and learning about this new chapter of your life. Last of all find a local church to be a part of that believes in the whole Bible. You don’t want to be alone on this journey.
God Bless You Richly! -Joel D. Harris
